Child Abuse During the Holidays Can Go Undetected

The holiday season is often seen as a happy time to come together with friends and family. But for kids experiencing neglect or child abuse during the holidays, that reality doesn’t change. While reports of abuse seem to decrease during November and December, this only means the cases are going unreported, not that they aren’t happening.

READ MORE: 6 Tips for Being Mindful of Trauma During the Holidays

In fact, risk factors like financial stress, family conflict, and increased time spent with loved ones, can make the holidays an especially dangerous time for kids in abusive homes.

Most child abuse, including sexual abuse, is committed by family members or someone the child knows in the home. According to the Administration for Children and Families, about 91.4% of all maltreated children were harmed by a parent, relative, neighbor, or another person the child knew. Spending time at home during the holiday break, away from school, increases the danger and lowers the chances that a trusted adult like a teacher will notice something and report the abuse.

These statistics highlight why the community must remain vigilant and proactive, even if the holiday season looks happy and relaxed on the outside.

Facts About Child Abuse and Neglect

Child abuse is defined by the CDC as “All types of abuse and neglect of a child under the age of 18 by a parent, caregiver, or another person in a custodial role (e.g., a religious leader, a coach, or a teacher) that results in harm, the potential for harm, or threat of harm to a child.”

There are different kinds of abuse and neglect:

Physical Abuse: the use of physical force that can result in injury (hitting, kicking, shaking, etc.)

Sexual Abuse: Sexual contact or acts with a child.

Emotional Abuse: Behaviors that harm a child’s sense of self-worth or well-being (humiliation, name-calling, withholding love)

Neglect: Failure to meet a child’s physical and emotional needs. This includes shelter/housing, food, clothes, education, and access to medical care.

Certain conditions and stressors can increase the risk of child abuse and neglect, especially during the holidays:

• Parental stress — high levels of stress, often due to work, family conflicts, or other pressures.
• Financial strain — struggles with unemployment, low income, or difficulty meeting basic needs.
• Housing instability — frequent moves, temporary housing, or unsafe living environments.
• Social isolation — limited contact with friends, neighbors, teachers, or classmates.
• Food insecurity — reduced access to consistent or adequate meals, which can impact children’s health and well-being.

Some Statistics About Child Abuse and Neglect

• Child Protective Service (CPS) received around 4,399,000 total referrals for child abuse in 2023 (the most up-to-date data we have currently)
• 2,000 children died from abuse and neglect in 2024.
• A majority of confirmed abuse cases were committed by mothers (35.8%), followed by fathers (26.7%).
• Foster parents or legal guardians committed less than .03% of reported abuse cases. Less than 0.2% were committed by group home staff.
• Substance abuse, high stress, mental health issues, poverty, lack of education, and continued cycles of abuse are the most common causes for abuse.
• 1 in 5 transgender adolescents, 1 in 5 girls, and 1 in 20 boys are victims of child sexual abuse.
• Abuse reports tend to be higher among Black and Indigenous communities, but this is highly suspected to be tied to prejudice and poverty, not race.
• LGBTQA+ children are 4x more likely to experience child sexual abuse than non-LGBTQA+ peers. These cases are likely unreported due to prejudice, discrimination and fear of retaliation.
• Calls for domestic violence tend to increase during December (15% of all cases), and these cases might still be underreported.
• Daycare providers, teachers, law enforcement, and medical personnel, like doctors and nurses, are the first to notice and report child abuse.

What can we learn from this?

• Parents are the most likely suspects for abuse.
• Most cases of child abuse are tied to high-stress situations like money issues and lack of support.
• Teachers, police, and daycare workers are the most likely to identify abuse.

We can assume from this that time away from school and caretakers outside of the family makes it more difficult to protect children from abuse.

Why Reports Appear to Go Down, But Risk Goes Up

During the holidays, a combination of increased stress, alcohol and substance use, financial pressure, and more time spent at home can create heightened risk for domestic and child abuse.

At the same time, school, and program closures mean fewer mandated reporters are in regular contact with children, so incidents may go unnoticed despite rising risk factors. The pressure to maintain a “happy” holiday image can also prevent victims from seeking help. This makes it especially important for caregivers, parents, and child advocacy centers to stay vigilant, monitor interactions closely, and take proactive steps to protect children during this vulnerable time.

Understanding the Risks

The holiday season, while often seen as a time of joy and togetherness, can actually increase the risk of child abuse. Reports of abuse often drop during this time—not because abuse decreases, but because children are out of school and away from teachers, counselors, and other mandated reporters who normally notice warning signs.

Most abuse is committed by someone the child knows and trusts, such as a family member, friend, or even a sibling. Abuse doesn’t follow the “stranger danger” narrative—it often occurs in familiar settings, behind closed doors, or during unsupervised play. Children may feel pressured to maintain the appearance of a happy holiday, which can prevent them from speaking up.

Several factors during the holidays can amplify risk:

• Heightened stress from financial pressure, family conflicts, or the expectation of a “perfect” holiday.
• Increased alcohol use at gatherings, which can escalate tensions and impair judgment.
• Reduced oversight due to school and program closures, leaving children with fewer adults monitoring their safety.
• Unsupervised play in closed or hidden spaces, creating opportunities for abuse to go unnoticed.

Understanding these risks is crucial for caregivers, parents, and child advocacy professionals. By staying alert, monitoring interactions, and maintaining open communication with children, we can help keep kids safe and empower them to speak up if something feels wrong.

Teaching Children to Protect Themselves

Empowering children to recognize red flags, have body autonomy, and speak up about uncomfortable situations is essential. Kids who are unafraid or unashamed to tell a trusted adult about what is happening to them.

Safety Rules to Teach Kids

1. It’s okay to say no – You don’t have to give hugs, kisses, or any physical contact if you feel uncomfortable, even with relatives or family friends.
2. Speak up about unsafe or inappropriate behavior – Always tell a trusted adult if someone touches you in a way that feels wrong or asks you to keep a secret about touching.
3. Use proper names for body parts – This helps you describe anything that makes you uncomfortable clearly and accurately.
4. Stay in visible areas – Play and socialize in common areas where adults can see you, avoiding closed or hidden spaces.
5. Check in with adults – Let a trusted adult know what you’re doing and who you’re spending time with, especially during family gatherings.
6. Watch for changes in feelings or behavior – Tell an adult if you feel scared, anxious, or upset around certain people or in certain situations.
7. Be safe online – Don’t share personal information, photos, or videos online without parental permission, and follow online safety rules.
8. Know your emergency contacts – Keep a list of trusted adults or hotlines you can reach if you ever feel unsafe.
9. Trust your instincts – If something feels wrong or uncomfortable, it probably is. Speak up and get help immediately.
10. Remember you are never alone – There are always adults who want to protect you, and it’s brave to ask for help.

What Caregivers Need to Do To Protect Children Against Abuse

When teachers, doctors, and law enforcement are not there (like during the holiday season), the community is children’s next line of defense.

Pay attention to subtle signs during holiday family gatherings and beyond.

Check in with children regularly throughout gatherings or playdates, asking open-ended questions like, “How are you feeling?” or “What are you up to?” This gives them confidence to speak up and share any concerns. Make sure play and social time happen in open, visible areas and limit risky one-on-one situations, ensuring any necessary one-on-one interactions are observable and interruptible.

Physical abuse may appear as unexplained burns, bites, bruises, broken bones, or black eyes, fading marks noticed after time away, fearfulness around parents or other family members, bedwetting, shrinking from adults, or direct reports of injury by a parent or caregiver.

Sexual abuse may be indicated by difficulty walking or sitting, refusal to change clothes or participate in physical activities, sudden changes in appetite, and unusual or sophisticated sexual knowledge or behavior.

Trust your instincts if something feels off. Be present and approachable so children know they can come to you without fear of judgment. Stay alert to digital risks from tablets, gaming systems, or online interactions by setting up parental controls and having ongoing conversations about online safety.

Finally, if a child ever confides in you, believe them. Stay calm and affirm their bravery, and contact child protective services or a hotline immediately. By combining supervision, open communication, and empowerment, caregivers can create a safe environment where kids feel confident, supported, and protected during the holidays.

Reform for the Child Welfare and Foster Care System

1 in 4 physicians do not report abuse because they don’t recognize the signs or are unfamiliar with child abuse cases, have a poor history with CPS, are biased, or are afraid of making a mistake.

In surveys, physicians who lacked formal education in child abuse believed their reports to CPS did not help. However, this is usually because they do not receive feedback or updates on the child after the report. Many also feared retaliation.

In one study, experienced nurses who reported abuse were more likely to:

• Have received training
• Know reporting forms and procedures
• Trust protection agencies
• Know where to refer cases
• Feel less fear of legal retaliation
• Discuss abuse at work
• Believe reporting was beneficial

More education, training, and better communication between CPS and doctors can encourage more physicians to report.

Risks and Consequences of Childhood Abuse

Children who are victims of abuse tend to struggle later on in life. Invisible Children lists the consequences for children as:

• 25% more likely to experience teen pregnancy.
• More likely to engage in risky sexual behavior.
• 30% more likely to abuse their own children.
• Have a greater risk for psychological disorders and mental health issues.
• 9 times more likely to become involved in criminal activity.

Keep Kids Safe This Holiday Season

The holidays should be a time of joy, but child abuse doesn’t take a break. With schools closed and fewer adults watching, abuse by familiar people can go unnoticed. Caregivers and communities must stay vigilant—supervise play, teach boundaries, check in with kids, and empower them to speak up. The best gift this season is safety, protection, and hope for every child.

The holiday season can be a joyful time, but the real gift is keeping kids safe. Stay vigilant, empower children, and protect them from harm this holiday season.