Why Fostering Teens Could Be the Best Thing You Ever Do

Many people who are considering adoption or foster care imagine rocking a baby to sleep or helping a child learn to ride their first bicycle. And while fostering younger kids is important, there’s a growing and urgent need for families willing to care for older children, including fostering teens. 

By the end of 2023, the Adoption and Foster Care Analysis and Reporting System (AFCARS) reported that about 28% of all foster children in the U.S. were over the age of 13, and only 12% of those teens were adopted. That’s over 105,000 kids who struggled to find homes. 

The truth is, fostering teenagers is a rewarding experience that potential foster parents often pass over because of harmful stereotypes. It’s important to remember that all babies grow into teenagers; every parent will have to learn to deal with them eventually. With fostering teens, you have the opportunity to guide a young person through one of the most formative times in their life. They may be more independent, but they still need encouragement, stability, and someone who believes in their future.

Busting Myths About Teen Foster Care

Despite harmful misconceptions, teenagers are not independent and in less need of guidance and love. They are still growing and learning, just like younger children.

Myth: Teens are harder to foster than younger children

One of the biggest misconceptions is that teens in foster care are “troubled.” Many avoid fostering or adopting older children because they have “baggage” from their time in the system. 

But the truth is, any child who has spent time in the system could have behavioral issues, and many of them are simply reacting to trauma, not creating it. Foster care exists because their home environment may not have been safe whether due to issues like abuse, neglect, or substance use, but not because they are difficult by nature. Expecting to have an “easier time” with a younger child is not only unrealistic, it’s harmful. 

Myth: Teens Need Less Care

Another prevalent myth is that teens don’t need foster care or are too independent to benefit from it. In fact, teens crave connection, structure, and care just like any other child, even if they don’t always show it. 

While teens might be more self-sufficient and might require less supervision, they are still growing and developing, which means they still need guidance and love. Consistency and care from caring foster parents can help them build confidence, develop lifelong communication skills, and help them visualize a future beyond the challenges of their past. 

Myth: You Need to Be More Experienced to Foster a Teen

You don’t need to be an experienced parent to care for a teenager. Even if you don’t have any experience with children. Building trust with a teenager might take time, but you don’t need to have all the answers. What they need most is someone who is patient, consistent, and willing to listen. Many foster parents grow and learn alongside the teens in their care. 

Think back to when you were their age – what expectations did others have that you didn’t meet? Remember how that time of your life felt, and the things you struggled with. That understanding can help ground and guide you during your journey and make all the difference.

The Real-Life Joys of Fostering Teens

Cynthia, a single foster parent, shared that fostering a teen was the perfect fit for her. “I work full-time,” she said, “so having a kid who’s old enough to come home from school and take care of themselves is helpful. I also knew how much of a need there was for teens.” She found her teenage foster daughter to be a great fit, explaining, “She’s a great kid. She gets along with my niece and nephew, and my whole extended family treats her like one of us.”

Darren, a father whose biological children are now grown, echoed a similar sentiment. “It was quieter than when my kids were young, but also more rewarding in some ways,” he shared. “My foster son is into mechanics, so we’ve been fixing up an old car together. It’s given us something to bond over, and I can tell he appreciates the time and attention.”

Even first-time foster parents have found unexpected joy in opening their homes to teens. Jasmine admitted she was nervous at first but quickly realized how natural it felt. “I was worried we wouldn’t connect, but it turns out we have so much in common,” she said. “She’s teaching me all the latest slang, and I’m teaching her how to budget and cook. It’s more like we’re growing together.”

The Long-Term Impact

Teens who age out of foster care without a stable support system face tough odds. Many struggle with housing, education, and employment. Many end up homeless, and others face health issues due to lack of care. Fostering a teen, even for a short time, can provide the support and skills they need to thrive into adulthood.

It takes care and consistency to help a teenager understand they’re not alone. When they feel truly safe and supported, that’s when they begin to open up, take healthy risks, and envision a future for themselves. A stable home can make all the difference. Sometimes it’s the first place a teen has ever felt secure enough to imagine a better life.

Be the Person Who Makes a Difference

You don’t need to be perfect, wealthy, or have a traditional family structure to foster a teen. What matters most is your willingness to be present, supportive, and consistent.

Fostering teens gives them a chance to feel seen, valued, and loved. It’s a powerful way to give back, and in return, you just might receive more than you ever expected.